Thursday, May 03, 2012

Link Thursday: 1,000 Things You Didn't Know About Women (Part 5)

Hey peeps!

Time once again for the 'list'. Catch some more insight into the minds and thoughts of regular women out there.

Catch up with the initial posts in this series from here ... and if you want to read the full list in one go, head to the original post found on Esquire.com

So here we roll...

Enjoy!


*****

1,000 Things You Don't Know About Women

We asked the women in our lives to share their secrets about sex, relationships, and what we've been doing wrong (and right) all these years. Four months after our special issue devoted to women — and with continuing help from you on Twitter — we've reached a thousand pieces of wisdom. Hope they help.


No. 531: We love to cry, and we always feel better after a big sob fest. How much better? Pull down your pants. — Denise Marquez, 40, Rochester, N.Y.

No. 236: If something in your past will show up on a Google search, be prepared to explain it. — Julia Phillips, 39, Longmont, Colo.

No. 1000: We love you guys. — Stephanie Shaughnessy, 41, Pittsburgh

No. 193: Because we love security and fidelity, we also love love handles. Your six-pack anxiety only threatens us with the possibility you might care more about your abs than you care about us. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 658: Don't tease us. We're not your little sister. —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 863: If we don't spend the night, don't give up on calling us back. We were probably just wearing Spanx. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 386: When we are truly angry, we go silent. That is your opportunity to apologize, or run. Neither will save you. —Lisa Huber, 38, Teutopolis, Illinois

No. 274: Some of us keep imaginary tallies in our head. "He keeps Diet Coke at his apartment because he knows I love it: 5 points. He's liberal: 10 points. He brought me soup when I was sick: 15 points. He made banana pancakes: infinity points." Your kindness is noted, appreciated and will be rewarded. —Rhiannon Falzone, 26, Chicago

No. 417: If it ever comes down to picking between spending time with your girl and playing World of Warcraft you have bigger issues than not understanding women. —Brittany Brundage, 21, Orem, Utah

No. 358: Loading the dishes without being asked — it means more than you know. —Alexandria Pruitt, 24, Louisville

No. 789: Practice proper text message grammar. Abbreviations are okay. "LOL" is not. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 467: We like it when you have a lot of male friends. It means you can maintain a good relationship, like the one you have with us. —Alexandria Pruitt, 24, Louisville

No. 439: We gauge how good a father you'll be by how you treat your family. —Alexandria Pruitt, 24, Louisville

No. 562: We know our orgasms can be difficult. Just keep at it. —Alexandria Pruitt, 24, Louisville

No. 574: Most successful men have a strong woman by his side. That would be us. —Amanda Allen, 24, Salt Lake City

No. 725: You have the power to make us feel like the only girl in the room. Use it wisely (and often). —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 343: Those times you remember the small details of our stories — like a random friend's name — is when we can tell you care. —Alexandria Pruitt, 24, Louisville

No. 651: Never underestimate the power of a kiss on the forehead. —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 317: When you challenge your lady to a game and lose, lose with a smile. Not with a broken tennis racket... for instance. —Michelle Schindler, 25, New York

No. 697: Sometimes we think we're in love, and then we see your Facebook profile. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 259: Honestly, we don't mind watching hours of Grand Theft Auto if we feel included. —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 330: Take us to Florence. But not in the summer. Too many tourists. —Rhiannon Falzone, 26, Chicago

No. 105: A five-star restaurant is rarely better than eating cold pizza on the couch with you. —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 158: We like it when you stand in the dressing room with us. And give compliments. —Molly Rosen, 33, Chicago

No. 127: "I love you." It's better when it's rare, spontaneous, and really meaningful. —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 245: Women in their twenties may look good while doing it, but most of them are thinking about how they look while they're doing it. Which means they aren't thinking about what they are doing. After their twenties, we have learned that feeling good is better than looking good. We also know that right after we use our good stuff with you, we're going to get the cuddling all those twentysomethings are bitching about. —Lisa Huber, 38, Teutopolis, Illinois

No. 993: Red, black, silky, leather, animal print — if any of these are adjectives that can be applied to your bedroom decor, we may still sleep over, but don't count on a call back. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 740: Buying us a candy bar is a surprising — and effective — gesture. Who doesn't like a candy bar? —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 289: A woman has certain spots that are for touching, squeezing, and pushing. These do not include her buttons. —Michelle Schindler, 25, New York

No. 378: Girls like to whine. It's a fact. —Brittany Brundage, 21, Orem, Utah

No. 431: There is nothing sexier than following through. If you say you're going to do something, please do it. —Brittany Brundage, 21, Orem, Utah

No. 598: When we say we want to share a dessert, we really mean we want you to have just one bite and offer the rest to us. We were planning on eating the entire lava cake ourselves anyway, but this way we don't feel guilty. —Aimee Couture, 22, New York

No. 675: Keep in mind that we'll read any e-mail you might leave open on the computer. It's our nature. (And yours too, by the way.) —Leticia Frazao, 25, New York

No. 689: Please be the man we know and love, even when we're at a barbeque reunion with your frat brothers. —Aimee Couture, 22, New York

No. 399: Nothing is quite as comforting as a big, man hug. Safe, warm, firm, but yielding. —Danielle Maupai, 28, Green Pond, New Jersey

No. 849: If you want to impress a girl, tell her you've heard of Say Yes to the Dress and leave it at that. Your feelings about the show are not important. —Jessica Brunelle, 22, Boston

No. 833: There are two acceptable forms of hair product for you: undetectable and nonexistent. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 710: We would rather take a hot-air balloon ride than grab drinks. If you don't have a hot-air balloon, just be creative. —Aimee Couture, 22, New York

No. 590: Even if we assure you we don't believe in Valentine's Day, buy the damn flowers. It couldn't be easier. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 597: We won't judge you for that occasional girly drink. Just be sure to give us a sip. —Aimee Couture, 22, New York

No. 858: Life gets so busy, sometimes it's nice to have someone to make choices for you. Even if it is just the Friday night movie. —Dani Ruiz, 22, Encinitas, California

No. 514: We do enjoy the gift of expensive jewelry. We just like to pick it out. —Danica Peterson, 22, Providence

No. 182: It's better when you make the effort to do simple things often than trying to make up for making no effort by doing something big and over-the-top. —Chantal Marchessault, 22, Gulfport, Florida

No. 307: Don't go to strip clubs. Just don't. —Katie Holleran, 23, Winchester, Massachusetts

No. 530: When a woman brings you to a store to show you something on more than one occasion, do you think maybe she wants you to buy it for her? Maybe? —Danica Peterson, 22, Providence

No. 490: There is no excuse for you to buy us lingerie for our birthday, anniversary, and Valentine's Day, all in the same year. —Danica Peterson, 22, Providence

No. 822: Whistling of any kind tends to make us walk faster in the opposite direction. —Jessica Brunelle, 22, Boston

No. 808: We can almost always tell how much porn you watch on a regular basis after sleeping with you the first time. Like, don't rip the panties off before getting to second base. Better to be vanilla than embarrassed. —Alexis Justman, 23, El Centro, California

No. 770: We can tell when the gift was purchased at the last minute. But we still like it. —Jessica Brunelle, 22, Boston

No. 239: Your knowing the difference between stilettos and flats is totally adorable. —Chantal Marchessault, 22, Gulfport, Florida

*****

From Mauritius with love,

Zee

2 comments:

sue said...

did yu get the e mail I sent this week?

Zee Monodee said...

Arghh, just found it in my Spam folder! Will re in a few, girl. Sorry for that! xoxo

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