Thursday, January 26, 2012

Link Thursday: Things A Man Should Never Do In The Company Of A Woman

Hey beautiful people!

Last year, in and around November (if you want to check the archives), I posted a series of links and articles that pertained to etiquette for today's gentlemen. There were the etiquette rules of dating, dinner dates, general how-to-behave tips, and from the feedback I've been getting, it appears a lot of you enjoyed those posts. Women like them so they can 'groom' their men; writers like them so they can write more wholesome heroes; men (yes, I swear I've had a few male friends contact me over these!) like them for the tips and pointers they can apply in real life, and to, (sadly) be a hit with women...

In light of this popularity factor, I went looking for more articles in the same vein. Once again, Esquire.com has proved to be a treasure trove of information.

The link I feature today is self-explicit. Written by the editors of Marie Claire, every tidbit on here is spot-on!

Read on for an eye-opener! You can access the original article here.

*****

Things a Man Should Never Do in the Company of a Woman

The editors of Marie Claire advise against bad tips, blow-drying, and cleaning your gun. We'll take their word for it.

By The Editors of Marie Claire


Reveal how much your car cost.

Clean your gun.

Polish high school trophies (which you still have displayed).

Refer to your mother as your best friend.

Rap.

Check out our assistant/roommate/the baby-sitter.

Question our footwear.

Blow-dry your hair.

Tip less than 20 percent.

Celebrity impressions.

Impressions of us.

Forget to carry cash.

Flip it, flop it, swing it around, tug on it, adjust it, scratch it, or do anything that will remind us that it's just a goofy appendage and not a mystical source of pleasure and satisfaction.

Wii.

Boot and rally.

Scream -- at the dog, at the guy who just stole your parking spot, at Eli Manning. Because, no matter how much Eli deserves it (picked off again!), when we hear you raise your voice, we have an idea of what we're in for.

Talk about former exploits. Ever.

Use the words bitch, slut, tramp, or whore, unless referring to another man.

Stick anything in our butts, unless previous discussions have occurred.

Tell us you're going to kiss us. (Just get on with it!)

*****

From Mauritius with love,

Zee

8 comments:

Tory Michaels said...

Interesting. I actually disagree with a LOT of these.

What's wrong with him blow-drying his hair? Someone should get use out of the stupid thing.

20%???? I think that's too high, but I'm a cheapskate.

Impressions are great, at least if they're any good.

Who carries cash any more? Yeesh.

I love me some Wii time!

How am I supposed to feel comfortable enough to whoop and holler at the game if the guy doesn't?!

I think it's sweet if a guy likes his mama. I wish mine were around to be friends with (I wasted too much time).

Question: are we talking an actual bang-bang gun, or are we talking about a gun Hehehe.

If you've got a nice car that I might like, you better own up how much you paid. How else can I know if it's in my price range?

Okay, I'm weird, I admit it. :)
Love the article, Zee!

Zee Monodee said...

Lol Tory! It IS dependent on a case by case basis... and on the lady in question :)

Sheri Fredricks said...

ROFL!! Zee, you kill me! Sticking something in my butt??!! I fell over and laughed at that one. Too freaken funny. These are ALL GREAT and I love reading them. Keep 'em coming!

sue said...

Enjoyed the post. Sadly my devil is a perfect gentleman and these weren't gross enough for the mistress' past relationships. Never mind - you're always a fun read

Zee Monodee said...

Lol Sheri! I know the feeling, I was like, Whoa!!! :)

Glad you enjoy the Thursday posts XOXO

Zee Monodee said...

Awww, Sue. I can see him cleaning a gun in front of her though :)

*hugs*

sue said...

He knows how to use a gun but doesn't in his present position. He told her about the vampire though -- may have to find a fault with him

Zee Monodee said...

I was sure he owned a gun! :)

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