Friday, February 11, 2011

Progress Friday

There's something about me people don't know - I'm my biggest berater. Okay, the word doesn't exist, but let's just explain it as - I'm the first person who will berate myself. Sometimes it's a good thing, sometimes it's not. Sometimes I could've had a hand in changing the thing I'm angry about (like not writing, not doing exercise, that sort of thing). Sometimes I couldn't have done a thing (like when you find the truth about people and happenings). Yet, I'm the first one who will never let myself off the hook.

In 2011, I've decided things will change. I will no longer be a happy-go-lucky butterfly flitting from here to there with no purpose. Nope. I'll carve my own way and make things happen. What I can change, I will change. I'll have purpose, drive, determination...

...and January 31 happened, seeing me totally NOT making my first deadline of the year!

Talk of feeling like a failure. Berating oneself? I don't think you wanna hear how hard I was on my case. Yes, I had extraordinary circumstances, I had valid excuses, I had nothing to prove. Think I fell for that? No way! If I myself won't uphold my standards, cannot respect myself, how do I expect others to respect me?

So that's how, with 10 days' lateness, I have finished the WIP. Whoohoo! I would've gone 'Yay me!' but I don't deserve that. Yes, life happens, sh*t happens - we deal with it. Doesn't mean we wallow in self-pity though. A deadline is a deadline; a goal is a goal. You make it, whatever it takes!

With that thought in mind, I hit my weekend. :) Goal? Spend time with my family. My son and I have a movie date tomorrow (DVD. Sorry, but theatre tickets are not part of my budget!). Now I can give myself a break, because I made my destination. So far... My new journey begins again soon.

Join me?

From Mauritius with love,

Zee

6 comments:

Unknown said...

And you know I'm so very proud of you! :) x

Zee Monodee said...

Thank you honey! :) XOXO

You know what hearing you say this means to me.

Nicole said...

You're not alone. I berate myself all the time. I'm the first person to tell others they're too hard on themselves, but then I turn around and do it to myself. I'm trying, though, to stop that because sometimes it's definitely counterproductive.

Zee Monodee said...

Hey Nicole

That's exactly it! You tell others to cut themselves some slack but you absolutely cannot do it for yourself.

Definitely counterproductive, but some days, I need the berating, or I'd wallow in my self-indulgence. :)

Thanks for the comment! Hugs

Trish said...

WhooHoo Zee, congrats on finishing your WIP. Have fun celebrating with your family this weekend.

Zee Monodee said...

Thanks Trish! We had fun yesterday, watched Despicable Me (with the sound turned low so the boys could make all the voices!) and then we saw Terminator Salvation. While they drooled over the machines and bikes in there, I got to ogle Sam Worthington. Good day on the whole, *grin*